My assets have been frozen.
I handed over my three valuable credit cards to my mother: American Express ($1,000 limit), Mastercard ($1,000 limit), and Amazon Store Card ($900 limit). Today, I sealed them up in an envelope and handed them over to her for safe keeping and protection…from me. I am like a walking bankruptcy filing. I mean, I am not terrible, but I definitely have an addiction to shopping and spending money.
My mission is to stick to a strict budget. I still have my debit card that is connected to my checking account – the money pit. I also retain access to my two smaller limit credit cards: $200 and $400. I can work with that. The Knicks/Cavaliers tickets are paid for and same goes for the hotel. I have the invoices to prove it. There is money in my checking account and my two remaining credit cards are paid off in full. I am also still selling things on Amazon.com and my poetry collection, Just Like Breathing, on blurb.com. My next Amazon Seller Central pay day is tomorrow and I am getting paid my most recent Brussels Airlines check tomorrow. All is going well so far. I just cannot go on any internet spending frenzies for a long time. I think my plan is to not spend large amounts until I have to purchase my Playstation 4, but that is not until the week of April 26, when Uncharted 4: A Thief’s End is released. Keep your fingers crossed that the release date does not get pushed back again.
Even though my relationship is extraordinarily messed up right now, I feel like 2016 will be a good year for me. Tomorrow, I am going to call the driving school about taking the five hour class so I can finally try again with the road test. I am a really good driver, but I get so nervous on the road test and totally botch up the parallel parking part of the test. I need to drive so often that I exude confidence on the road test itself. Also, once I take the five hour class, I can keep taking the test as many times as I need until I pass it. I just need to have that certificate to back me up.
I need a license so that I can decide to drive off and go to Rocky Hill to visit Zachary. I don’t care how many people tell me that I should break up with him, right now…he is who I need in my life. I fell in love with him. That’s not something I can just throw away because our situation is utterly fucked up. I am going to get my license, get a job, get a car, and if that still does not fix the situation or make it easier, then we will figure that out.
Now, it is late and I have therapy in the morning. So, I bid a good night to all.