I cannot get him to go, and I have tried so many times; I have said it so many ways. I’ve been rude, I’ve been stern, and I even tried getting drunk and disorderly and still he will not go. He does not make me happy anymore, but I can’t let go and apparently neither can he. When he’s gone, I’m sad, but I know I will get over it. Then, he comes back, and the pain starts all over again.
I had a thought.
Maybe, he and I are meant to work through this? If he won’t go away, then what if that’s because the universe is trying to tell me that this is the guy for me, but he is just extremely rough around the edges and is a significant fixer-upper? What if that’s not why he is still around? What if he is my lesson in letting go?
I am fresh out of ideas of how to handle this boy. Maybe I’m crazy to keep talking to him, but I can’t help it. He meant so much to me at one point and sometimes my mind flashes back to that moment. It was a beautiful moment, but that’s all it was.